Mommy Brain and God

I realized today, at a random moment in time, that I've been acting a lot like a busy mom of late. It's not that I have so many children to take care of, or that I have been overly domestic, it's because I did that thing that busy moms do.

Only I did it to God.

I looked out the window this morning, when I woke up, and saw the neighbors, harvesting a rice patty by hand. As I climbed down the creaky bunk-bed ladder and shuffled into the kitchen, I set goals in my head for all the things I would do today. I further stewed over my grandiose plans as I stirred my 3-in-1 and scrambled some eggs. Today would be a productive day.

And it was.

But at some point, between the paper I wrote and fetching myself some lunch, I walked through a doorway and realized that I was loosing track of the point. Just like the busy mom whose day is so filled with laundry, dishes, meals, and chauffeuring that she doesn't actually spend time with her kids, I have been so busy serving God, that I forgot to know Him. Like the mom who cannot find her child in the grocery store, I sometimes find myself on the mission field, still looking for God.

It's possible, you know.

But it's pointless. Yeah, sure, I'm living on the other side of the world, volunteering my finances, skills, and my life for God's kingdom, but sometimes a lot of times I actually am losing track of Him. It's not that I'm neglecting scripture reading or prayer, but that I'm so busy pursuing His work, that I forget to pursue God. Not just going through the motions, but knowing Him.

It's like mommy brain for Christians.

I'm going to need a lot of wisdom, actually. Wisdom to avoid repeating this mistake. Frankly, I don't know how to avoid this pitfall. I don't know how to keep my focus corrected. The service aspect is so tangeable. And seeking God? Not as much. But although I don't know how, I'm determined to find out.

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. Matthew 7:7-8