On Healing Births....

So, my last post on here was kinda sad. Let me tell ya, it hit me hard, feeling death so close. It is so contrary to what the theme of this profession really is. And yet, so in keeping with it all at the same time. It took me a few days to shake the really heavy sadness I felt following the miscarriage of my patient. A few days before it was not the only thing I could think about.

Sophie, her sweet mother, and myself

 
I asked a housemate of mine, who has been here longer and been through more, how she heals. And she told me about healing births. Sometimes, after a really tough situation, God gifts you with a really great birth, and it really helps you heal. It had been quite a while since I took my place at the end of the bed, so I was excited for my shifts last weekend, hoping....praying for my healing birth.

 

Sophie managed a little smile for me

Saturday night was exciting. I walked through the clinic door, knowing I was first in line for a baby, and hearing the words "4-5 cm head visible". Time to shift into gear. I popped my hair up, changed shoes, and within 30 seconds I was running into the cubicle, pulling gloves on. I barely got them on in time for "head out!" I worked quickly, to make sure the umbilical cord was not around the neck, and then, about a minute after I walked into the door, the baby made her grand entry. Then came the blood.
Lots of blood.
And more.
And more.
 Our team worked frantically to help the mother stop bleeding, praying in our heads, our communication fragmented; walkie-talkie style. And suddenly, it stopped and everything was fine. I cared for her through the night, but it felt more like a whirlwind than a healing birth. I thought it would probably be a while before I welcomed another baby, because shifts have been a little slower of late.

Tuesday night I prayed for wisdom and skillful hands as I prepared for shift. I was first up again, but who knew if there would be any labors. Again I was summoned to a cubicle immediately. This little mamma was exhausted at the tail end of a 29 hour labor. She was really close to giving birth, but she was really tired, and having a difficult time working with her body. It looked like it would be a while, and everyone but me left to meet for endorsements. I watched my poor, little mamma trying so hard, and making no progress. I spoke encouraging words to her, and prayed for wisdom.

Momma, Daniella and I

 At once I knew what to have her try. With her next contraction everything changed. I called for help, and within about three minutes, her squalling baby girl was in her arms. As I cared for her through the night, joy filled my heart. I knew that THIS birth would be one I'd remember. One where I'd asked God for wisdom as a midwife, and He granted it.

Me with Daniella, my healing birth

 I realized that this birth was custom made for me. My heart began to take joy again in the glorious miracle of pregnancy and birth. My spirits were lifted, and my hope, renewed. This was exactly what I had asked God for.


This was my healing birth.