The Adventures of Miss-o-wissa V4.1

Friends and Brethren,

It is with great joy and excitement that I inform you... There are 47 wonderful days left until I turn the page at the end of this chapter of my life. The next chapter has a title, but most of the details are yet to be written. August 1st, I will hug my family goodbye, and board a train for the west coast. After a two day cross-country adventure, I will meet with some of my future co-workers, where we will have three days of orientation before beginning two days worth of flights to the Philippines! I am so excited to begin living the story that the Father has written for this chapter of my life. May His glory be spread through my life.

Sometimes I have to pinch myself. It simply CANNOT be possible that this is really how blessed I am. A lifelong dream-turned-calling.... Something I've been preparing years for. It is here. Reality. I sometimes overflow with the joy and spill it out into words on my new blog www.missowissa.blogspot.com. Please feel free to keep up with me through my updates there. Also, If you are interested in receiving a contact card with my info while in the Philippines, please send me your address.

I am overwhelmed by the faithfulness of my Father, who has been perfectly providing every need as it arises. It is the little things, that are sometimes WAY bigger than the big things. It is the fact that The One Who Operates The Universe has time to care that I am blessed with something so simple as the wristwatch I needed....and it was even yellow. This boggles my mind. He has provided for plane tickets, visa fees, tuition.... Everything just as I have needed it. And I know He will continue to be Faithful.

One of the biggest questions: Are you nervous? No. While I understand that I will inevitably be pushed beyond my comfort zone, that I may feel terribly lonely at times, that I have NO IDEA what awaits me in the next two years, I do know with confidence that this is where the Father wants me. Therefore, there is no fear. I understand that I will see the unthinkable, that I will feel the heart-rending, that I understand things I don't care to. Yet I know The One who has authored solutions and comfort and A Way of Escape. So I will move forward in His grace, share His love, and rest in His comfort. And may He be glorified.

I'm thankful for a job that I love, and can put my heart into until I leave. I'm thankful for friends who have been so great and supportive even though I carry on ENDLESSLY about all things pregnancy, birth, and Philippines. I'm thankful for an amazing family who have supported my dreams, moderated my big ideas, and been so flexible as I've lived these last few months with no car. I'm thankful for a church who has chosen to stand with me in prayer as I prepare for departure. I'm thankful for a chance to get a head start on the language I'll be speaking. I'm thankful for a Father who knows my deep desires, and cares to grant me what my heart has longed for. To go to the nations.

I would love to hear what is going on in each of your lives.

Grace and peace,

Miss-o-wissa

 He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose. -Jim Elliot

I Dreamed a dream...

I woke up, relief flooding my body with those little prickly feelings that seep down into your fingertips.
Dreams.
Three of them... one after another.
They weren't real.
Breathe... You are NOT about to miss your train. You are NOT behind on packing. You have NOT forgotten important details.
These were a first for me, these dreams. I've dreamed of catching babies, but not of leaving. It was so real.
But I know why.
It is because of preparation.
It is because of timing.

Two months exactly.
In exactly two months and 14 minutes, I will board the train that will depart. I will leave my home and start a new chapter of my life.
I can't wait!
Most of my earthly possessions have found new homes, one way or another.
My winter clothes are gone.... another reason I lament this 50' weather today.
My room begins to look empty.
Goodbyes occur with increasing frequency.
My list of 'last times' has begun.
And every weekend is planned until I go.
I'm cherishing this time. My family. My church. My friends. My work...
And dreams  of my future.

On Mother's Day...

Two weeks ago I celebrated Mother's Day in a very special way. I joined a young couple as they welcomed their first baby into the world. To become a mother on Mother's Day.... precious. What an amazing welcoming party it was! Family of two, became family of three. Husband became father, Wife... mother.
A beautiful transition that changed each person's life...Forever.
That tiny cry that told us she was here... and well.
And my eyes were filled with happy tears.
Birth is amazing. This one was filled with answered prayers... so many.
Healthy baby girl
Healthy momma, and proud daddy.
Peace, Strength, and Courage throughout.
And so much more.

I hope I never lose the wonder. I wish always to feel the awe of new birth. I hope I always tear up. Because it is such a beautiful, amazing, and miraculous experience.

On Anticipation....

I can't wait!
I can't wait!
It is so hard to believe that this is my life.
Every time I  say it, it tingles in my fingertips.
"I'm moving to the Philippines for two years!"
The days are flying by, sometimes too quickly, and other times too slowly.
Occasionally, they are moving by at exactly the right pace.
All the little details, falling into place.
One
    by
       One.
Trying to savor each day, and to prepare at the same time. 

 72.
That is the number of days.
Days to enjoy my family and my home.
Time to visit with friends and relatives.
To figure out what to pack...and what to let go of.

God has  been blessing so much. Visa application papers are coming along, and I found some scrubs. God used a dear sweet girl to bless me with a stethoscope and blood pressure cuff. And He really blessed my sales of hair accessories at the Delafield Art Walk. I still have inventory here.

He is providing in so many ways, and I am so thankful. It truly is beyond what I dare to ask or imagine. This heart is thankful.

But I don't Get It....

But I don't get it....
I was thinking about some different situations in my life. Things that have brought me pain. Situations God has allowed, but I don't understand.
Loved ones taken... seemingly prematurely.
Friendships lost.... seemingly unnecessarily.
Conflict.... unresolved
Needs... unmet
Things I cannot make sense of.
Why?
God has a reason for everything He does; for all that He allows. Sometimes, we can see those reasons. Even days, weeks, or years later, the reasons begin to become clear. Other times, it requires faith. That recent pain, so fresh in my heart, and I cannot find an answer.
Why God?
What are you trying to teach me?
Like a loving Father, He is there. The pain that He allows is for my good. It may be like the pain of discipline required to teach a child not to run into the street.... a temporary, but necessary pain. Or, it may be like teaching a child moderation in consumption of cookies... a life lesson in self-denial and temperance, ultimately for well-being of the child. The benefits of the first are immediately realized. The second may only be realized later in life, or never completely understood. But both are for good.

I don't understand this pain, but I'm learning that part of faith is giving up the right to understand. I don't understand why God would allow something that seems so good to be taken from me. I don't see a reason.
But I will trust.

Why?
Why will I trust?
How can I know that God isn't just treating me with cruel hands, playing with my emotions, breaking my heart?
Because there are other things that I don't understand.
I don't understand why God has chosen to love me.
I don't know why He chooses to give me grace rather than justice.
I don't understand why He doesn't give up.
I don't understand why He has chosen to use me on the mission field.
I don't get it.

This lack of understanding lends perspective to the other. It shows me God's heart toward me.
It teaches me to trust.

On Going With the Flow....

I sat on a fallen tree, centered over the lazy creek, dropping pieces of bark into the water one by one. Then I watched them float. Some quickly caught the mid-stream current and made a fairly fast cruise downstream. Others spun along near the edges of the current, tracing lazy circles or getting caught in the weeds along the edge. Some started out quickly, but left the main current and lodged along the side of the banks. Still others did not look nearly as promising initially, but quickly caught  on and sailed away.
As I was talking with God, I asked him if there was a lesson in those pieces of bark. The words that came to mind were, Go with the Flow. I thought about how important it is, spiritually, to make sure we are in the current of God's will. And I repented for the many times I've drifted out of that current, and been side-tracked and waylayed by the things life had to offer.  But I need God. I need Him to be the driving force in my life. I need to be carried away with following Him.

So I am praying that God will teach me more and more, my need for Him. I pray that dependance will become a normal thing for me. I am begging God to keep me from being side-tracked by all the insignificant things life has to offer. And I guess I'm just striving now, to go with His flow.

Reflections

So I went for a walk today... Just me and God. We had a lot to talk about. And I just wanted to be with Him. This crazy life I live, it's not exactly slowing down any time soon. But I need God in it. So I hiked some beautiful trails, and climbed out on a dead tree over the creek and just talked with God.

 As I looked down into the reflections, I noticed how fuzzy they were. How dull, and unlike the real, vibrant forest around me. And, of course, this set me to thinking. I think usually what we see of life is kinda like those reflections. We get the gist of what is reality, but usually, we don't see life for what it really is. Instead, we are frustrated with the ill-defined shapes and colors we perceive, and we neglect to look up. To look at REALITY. Because most of the clarity comes when we put these things in an eternal, God-centered perspective. It is only then, through the eyes of faith, that we can see and appreciate the beauty God is working in our lives. Only then can we begin to understand.

 I'm so thankful for all the beauty God created around me. I'm thankful for the warm weather we are enjoying, and the chance to appreciate this beauty. I'm thankful for the color yellow. Colors are great, but yellow is particularly grand.

And I'm thankful for eyes to see, and a heart to perceive the beauty God is creating all around me.